So, Hyundai Clients Are Stupid.

I’m amused.

I work at a call-center which does customer service car surveys to harass people (erm I mean ask)  how they liked their amazing dealership experience.

So I’ve roughly been dialing the project for Hyundai when it first started (6-8 or so months ago..I think?) and recently, as in two weeks ago, they told me I couldn’t dial the project anymore because the Hyundai client didn’t like the sound of my voice – they said I sounded too young.  Uhm…No shit? But nonetheless, I got kicked off the project, which is pretty amazing cause apparently I’m being assigned to a better project with a bit more pay potential and a lot less work involved on my part. The automatic dialer is slower on this project so that means  I can do simple things now like read books/study while I dial as opposed to before where I was constantly talking that I couldn’t read and still understand what’s going on in the book.

Hurrayz, I don’t have to deal with Hyundai’s bullshite anymore and I get paid more!

We’re paid well, but we still have no money.

To some readers who are no longer that frequent, I will let them know that I am actually quite a lazy blogger. (If they haven’t already encountered this). I have seen a lot of interesting things that would probably be a worth while read (in my opinion), but I’m simply too lazy to think of the right words to creatively express it.

Outsourcing Call-center jobs who require %100 English might as well be the better paying jobs around the country (Costa Rica). They don’t need you to have a degree and even if you did you’d still have the same position as the person without. You could have an ostentatious vocabulary but it’s not going to impress anyone especially sitting next to the person who staggers with three syllables. (Trust me, it happens).

We get paid every two weeks on a Friday, though, for a great paying job and all, people are still broke by Monday.

The people who work at the job usually do not have papers which means they have a hard time getting a local credit card, a cellphone, or even a car.  So technically they only -really- have to pay for Rent, Food, Electric bill, and Water bill. Some of them Do have internet but out of the overall it’s just a few. So the money they have in the bank or on them is all that they have and have a hard time going below zero.

So how does someone only get 5 dollars for a paycheck on payday? Easy. She, being stupid and incapable of doing any sort of intelligent math, goes to Ticolo down at the food court using the badge, money they take out of your future paycheck, three times a day everyday. Though, I must admit it’s a special case, but it’s still a case nonetheless.

The most common of cases though are people in need of money for mere transportation. I spend about ₡890 colones for four bus trips. ₡260 from Home to Sanjose, Sanjose to Sanpedro ₡185.  Exchange rate for $1 dollar is currently ₡543.50. So I spent roughly a dollar and a half  on transport a day. The most expensive of buses I use is the Alajuela bus which is ₡420. So when people, at a decent pay job for the country of course, can’t even afford to get home in the middle of the week is pretty poor money management.

Rent can range up to $170-400 dollars around the San Pedro-ish areas. $400 being in the Very High Range and $200 being in the Decent (and common) range. At the job, if you have more than 95% English you’re base salary is at $4.50 an hour.  (It can and does go higher depending on the project you are on.) So let’s say one works 5.5 paid hours a day for four days and 9 paid hours on Saturdays. ]

So that’s 31 hours in one week times 2= 62

62 times 4.50 = 279

279 times 0.09 (tax) = 25.11

253.89 is how much you’re getting every paycheck.

253.89 times 2 = 507.78 every month.

Now, that’s the bare minimum one could do. (Unless one leaves early.) People can work 6 days – 7 days a week and they can come in how ever early they want as long as they for fill their scheduled shift. I know people who make 700 dollars every paycheck. Though if one really does work the minimum of 500 bucks a month you’re cutting it tight on your expenses and you’re probably not saving much but it’s do-able.

There’s a woman at work who is a single mom, has four kids, supports her house keeper, receives no child support, she owns her house, as well as a car, and has no debts. She gets in roughly 100 hours every paycheck and that amount is enough to support all of these things.

So if all these people make so much money where does the money go? Booze is probably the main source, partying out for three days straight and not coming in to work because you’re too hung over might be the cause of this, which also might effect the fact you can’t get home or to work the next day. Spending money you don’t have through your badge on food and not calculating properly. Buying 150 dollars Nike shoes and spending  a 100 dollars on make up might also be the cause, but, they’re a ‘must’ have aren’t they?

Whether one is in a good paying job or a clerk for some shoe store, if people have not learned how to manage money properly they will find a way to blow their two weeks earnings in a course of a day quite easily. In the end, the amount doesn’t really matter.

Neglection Comes Out Of Fashion!

So I’ve sort of forgotten about my blog like the orphans. Speaking of which, no one wants to help the terminally ill children. Bastards. I try to use it as a hook while I’m doing my cold-call surveys to random households in the states. It doesn’t work as well as I thought it would. Just so I don’t be labelled as ‘unmoral’, it wasn’t my idea to lie like that – I just read whatever is on the script. On my introduction it doesn’t need to be verbatim though, so I don’t always use the terminally ill joke.

WE HAVE CHURCHS HERE. (Churchs the fast food place not the big..you know..god temple). We were doing quicktrack which is basically a 40 minute survey about fast food restaurants but there were some special 2-4 minute ones where they just question specific fast-food places like Churchs or Round Table’s Pizza. I remember someone commenting to me about doing a 2-3 minute survey about Churchs – it was really hard to complete because no one ate there. So I was amused when I was walking in San Jose and saw Churchs Chicken as a fast food place, I was like, “OMFG WE HAVE CHURCHS. I DO SURVEYS ABOUT THAT. NO ONE EATS THERE. OMFG LET’S GO THERE TO MAKE SURE IT EXISTS *points*”

So at work, who basically hires who-ever speaks good enough English, this consists of criminals, criminals who have been to prison, ex-gang members, part/full time pimps, ex-cops, ex-marines, the ghetto, the broke, part-time hookers, and basically what ever you can think of.

I hang out with the Ghetto and the Criminals and sometimes like…one ex-marine, but it’s mostly criminals. I.E I hang out with the interesting people. Though, one would think that the ghetto people aren’t that interesting. I dunno, it’s amusing when they’re talking about what STD they might have contracted while kissing that rat. (Okay that didn’t happen). Well, I find that the ghetto people are more straight forward and it most certainly beats the conversations where people are giving other people advice on how to live their life and whose boyfriend she’s cheating on and who will be a good match to date and…blah. Plus I find their vocabulary very entertaining.

Also, you learn at lot from criminals…not in like the ‘create a crime’ kinda way but more in the, ‘how to concealed yourself while walking in the streets’ or ‘how to avoid other crimmials’…which now that I think about sort of leads up to creating a crime but that’s not what I’m using it for.

The part time pimp knows….a hella a lot of hookers obviously and he was pointing out who’s who. He was surprise to see this one girl there (at work) so he went up to her and went, “Sooooo, does your boyfriend know what you do on the weekends?” I laughed so loud.

I eat with an ex-gang member everyonce in a while. It’s nice to know that you’re hanging out with a really cool -most likely- murderer. (I mean that in no harsh way. It really is). He teaches me a lot of things..not to make it sound that I’ll be joining some sort of gang in order to prove my self-worth or anything. The fact that he’s an ex-gang member and is still living shows that there’s intelligence.

So I know how much hookers make in a night, I know that I will never want to join a gang, nor go to prison, and I learned a new dialect of English.

Going to work is actually kinda cool.

Sooo…I’m not pregnant

So it may become a surprise to some, but I am no longer pregnant. I was unfortunately stabbed in the ovary by a rusty fork and my already planned orphan was killed on imparted by the raging homeless-man. Being stabbed in the ovary is not a fun ha-ha experience. My whole life story flashed before my eyes. It wasn’t very amazing. Woke up, ate, got pregnant…and then that’s when I noticed the blood overflowing like there was no such thing as The ‘Great Flood’. I saw the homeless man pass me in slow motion, he was a drag queen and was pushing along a pram with a dog in it with about 5 other dogs wearing dresses following him. I don’t know if this was the loss of blood talking though. I don’t remember anyone screaming, but there was a voice on the inside saying, “Serves you right for not buying that dude’s bible.”

Yes, I am a moral-less bastard. People who do not follow by the book become hallow, soulless, and a hole becomes drilled into their heart as His light is missing from their life…Or something.

I wonder what my boyfriend is going to say. I mean, I know I like him and all but there’s this other guy and we have really good chemistry together, but I don’t know, because it’s really hard that I have a boyfriend and I really care for him and whatever, but my friend is so much better than my boyfriend.

Oh right I’m bleeding.

Well, I am very displeased of this incident as I was greatly looking forward to the bundles of dough I would have received in return..But whatever. Shit happens and death comes to all.

I Love Money.

I got paid today.

Money is the root of all evil because it leads you to the path of many pleasures.

My Aura senses are tingling.

There’s this guy at work named Fernando. I was on my lunch break and I sat near him as he worked. He and his conrads do inbound calls so it’s not like they need to dial and be constantly talking like I do. It was the first time we actually talked and he told me I was a cool person, my ego likes to be flattered with facts advocating it’s genius not be buttered with simplistic wording so I told him to go into detail, he said that I was always friendly to everyone and he knew I was cool but he never knew HOW cool I was until I sat with him that day. I don’t know if he was hitting on me or just making talk, but he went into how he was a very spiritual person and said that he could sense that my Aura was Good. “You know,” he said, “you can always tell if someone is good or not and you’re one of those people who are good.”

I don’t understand why people think I’m a good person. Just because I’m friendly and nice doesn’t mean I don’t have 8 different plans of how to sever and cook their heads effortlessly.

Garlic. Garlic makes everything better.

A lot of people tell me I’m innocent too. I find it some what amusing that I can keep them in the dark. Their arrogance about my age blinds them I think, it angers me to an extent but it makes me giggle to the point of bursting out The Joker’s laughter. I sometimes wonder if they’ll ever suspect that I’ll be the one who’d enjoy taking a brick to their head and smashing it over, and over, till they realize, as bits of skull shatter and splitters in to their brain, that the young oh-so-innocent one was the one who did it before anyone else had the guts to….

I honestly thought everyone could see my horns spiked proudly.

He also mentioned something rather odd and said that, “I am glad our personalities have merged today.” I tried to say ‘connected’ as merge was a bit of an eyeball rolling on the captain’s deck but I gave him some slack as I don’t believe his first language is English.

New job, Pregnancy questions, kewlio.

My bestfriend and I have the best conversations Ever. :]

Fluff: I got a new job
Newb: What is the job?
Fluff: Sports book amoung other things.
Fluff: but it’s not like sports book.
Fluff: I’ll explain in a moment.
Newb: among other things = office slut
Fluff: No not office slut dude XP
Newb: too bad, office slut gets good dental
Fluff: SHUT UP
Fluff: Oh
Fluff: my
Fluff: god
Fluff: key
Fluff: board
Fluff: acting
Fluff: weird
Fluff: can’t
Fluff: type
Fluff: [weak]dawl
Newb: news flash
Newb: you’re typing
Fluff: Diuderus
Newb: …
Newb: LOL
Newb: diuderus
Fluff: but yeah, it’s debt counseling, real estate, and taking bets at the sports book
Newb: interesting
Newb: hours?
Fluff: Dunn yet
Fluff: they want me to come in tomorrow 10am
Fluff: I think it’s gonna be 12 hours work though
Newb: 12 hours a day?
Fluff: but it’s okay because it’ll be doing something interesting.
Fluff: yeah.
Fluff: I think.
Newb: loool
Fluff: that’s what I see at least.
Newb: owned
Newb: in your face
Fluff: meh. not really.
Newb: what’s the pay?
Fluff: 5 dollars an hour. which is like a lot for here.
Fluff: you know that.
Newb: yeah
Fluff: Stop laughing.
Fluff: Now.
Newb: that’s like 60$ a day, not that bad for someone who doesn’t pay rent
Newb: almost 2000$ a year
Fluff: …uh…year?
Fluff: you mean month.
Newb: brain no working right now
Fluff: ya I no
Fluff: 2k a month for someone who doesn’t pay rent for a place where you can buy like a beer for a dollar.
Fluff: that’s a lotta beers man.
Newb: uh
Fluff: okay for like 4 dollars.
Fluff: you get the point.
Newb: its like 900$ a month dude
Fluff: Same shit
Newb: you get 10800$ a year
Fluff: different 9 zero number thingie.
Fluff: for the real estate thingie you get comission and paid by the hour.
Fluff: but that’s harder I beleive.
Newb: so you’d have to bust your ass hardcore, and be amazing at it
Fluff: then there’s this debt stuff …that I dunno how much that pays but yeah.
Newb: What were you wearing when you went in?
Fluff: Heels, light blue pants and a white button t-shirt.
Fluff: That was on thursday.
Newb: You coulda done better.
Fluff: …
Fluff: Oi.
Fluff: what do you mean I could have done better?
Newb: Heels, miniskirt and halter-top.
Fluff: The guy thought I was 20.
Fluff: Shut the fuck up =.=
Newb: He woulda thought you were a 22.3
Newb: 😛
Fluff: is that a scale of 1-10 10 being the best?
Newb: yes.
Fluff: kewlio
Fluff: XD
Newb: 😛
Fluff: I’m sitting here naked in a towel.
Newb: i’m sitting here naked in a nothing.
Fluff: yeah, i just said kewlio and I’m repairing it by being naked.
Fluff: Haha in a nothing.
Newb: but yeah, i have a looooot of shit to do for my site
Newb: what do you think of it?
Newb: hello? batman?
Fluff: Hoi
Fluff: I like it
Newb: Yeah? really?
Fluff: it’s kind of simply ish
Fluff: like
Newb: well that’s too bad, cause it sucks
Fluff: I think it needs like a
Newb: it’s better than most of the junk online, but it still sucks
Fluff: grey with like white..like a gaid.
Fluff: giedet
Newb: i’m redesigning it
Newb: entirely
Fluff: fuck it how do you say it?
Fluff: dude
Newb: …
Fluff: you need a lay out plan of the site.
Fluff: Gaidet
Fluff: gident
Newb: ……
Fluff: garidet
Newb: rofl
Fluff: …It’s the thing that like
Newb: gradient?
Fluff: goes from white to black or black to white
Fluff: YES
Fluff: thank you
Fluff: yeah
Fluff: it needs that from that shade of gray
Newb: gradients are horrible for site design for the most part.
Fluff: and the letters need to be bigger.
Fluff: espeically the top words need to be bigger and wider
Fluff: more in the center.
Newb: You can change text size.
Fluff: The two D’s are cool.
Newb: No, they aren’t. I’m redesigning them. They suck.
Fluff: ..
Fluff: Well
Newb: I thought they were cool too, until i realised they weren’t.
Newb: XD
Fluff: have a lay out plan and not just like gopher it all gangster style.
Newb: you have to just gopher it so that you can figure out WHAT you want, THEN you plan it out
Newb: But yeah, i’ve spent like the last 2 days just designing logos. I’ll show them to you next time you get on.
Fluff: Okay
Fluff: Sure
Fluff: sorry I haven’t been on in a while
Fluff: it’s been pretty busy
Fluff: moving jobs and what not.
Newb: it’s okay, i know. you suck the fat cock.
Fluff: but this job is so much cooler.
Fluff: Oh
Fluff: I have a belly now.
Newb: …
Fluff: laugh.
Newb: pregnant?
Fluff:: go ahead.
Fluff: HAHA
Fluff: no.
Newb: okay, good XD
Fluff: at my job…
Newb: cause THEN i would laugh
Newb: a lot
Fluff: the guy had to do it because of the law purposes but he said
Fluff: “Are you pregnant?”
Fluff: I was like
Fluff: ……
Fluff: No?
Newb: LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
Fluff: and he’s like
Fluff: “Are you sure?”
Fluff: “….Pretty sure.”
Newb: i would have shit my pants right now if i was wearing any
Fluff: Haha
Newb: that was so fucking hilarious
Fluff: Dude
Fluff: it was just for legal purposes.
Fluff: but yea
Newb: yeah
Fluff: I was like
Newb: sure
Newb: >.>
Fluff: “well..if I am, I don’t know about it.”
Fluff: and he’s like “that’s not good enough, you need to get tested.”
Newb: sounds like you
Fluff: I was like.
Fluff: />.>
Newb: it falls out one day
Newb: and you’re like
Newb: “oh shit, i guess i WAS pregnant”
Fluff: Yeah I know XD
Fluff: anyway then he goes.
Fluff: “Do you plan on becoming pregnaunt in 6 months?”
Fluff: …No….
Newb: lololo
Fluff: then he goes
Newb: are you a velociraptor?
Fluff: “Were you pregnaunt in the past 30 days?”
Newb: well
Newb: what did you say?>
Fluff: I was like. “Uh…..Do I really look that fat?”
Fluff: XD
Newb: looool
Fluff: they were like Hahaha..
Newb: imba 😀
Fluff: but yeah..I could have been..unless I was abducted.
Newb: anywho, dude, i need to sleep
Newb: it’s late as hell
Fluff: then he was like “okay..I think that’s it for legal purposes” he wasn’t even looking at a piece of paper
Fluff: and I was like “yeah..Fuck that shit.”
Newb: what days do you work now?
Fluff: Dunno yet.
Newb: well
Newb: when you find out
Fluff: Mon and tue are my days off I think.
Fluff: but I’m going in morrow because of baseball season
Newb: and tell me your schedule
Fluff: i’ll email you at the gmail one I think
Newb: so i can get on when you will be
Fluff: okay
Fluff: hang on
Newb: k
Fluff: let me see which one I have added on msn
Newb: that works.
Newb: well anyway
Fluff: yeah
Fluff: that one I’ll email you on
Fluff: Good night
Fluff: So wait
Fluff: I can send you emails now?
Newb: i’ll see you later, you preggy freak
Newb: yeah
Fluff: because I remember before you were all liek fuck that shite
Fluff: oh cool okay good, soI’ll send you more emails now.
Newb: i prrroooobably won’t reply because it’ll make you angry
Fluff: WHY?
Fluff: Dude
Newb: but i will read them
Fluff: you need to reply
Newb: because it makes you mad 😀
Fluff: ..but dude
Newb: and that i find humorous
Fluff: reply
Newb: sure thing 😀
Newb: see you later gook
Fluff: That’s also another reason why I don’t send you emails
Newb: haha
Newb: alright, fine
Newb: i will
Fluff: because you never reply so it’s like I’m not sending you shit if you’re not bothering
Fluff: good.
Newb: now goodnight
Fluff: ciao
Fluff: sleep well
Newb: you too 🙂

Loathsome Surveys.

Before this job, I was a happy, healthy, internet obsessed, warcraft 3 playing addict. On Msn, Jeremy – the dude who I added from a friend of a friend of a friend who lives in a different country (I just added three friends because it makes the reader confused. Are you confused? Well, I am at least, I don’t even think there’s a third friend involved), would woefully send me surveys while I was busy destroying Pink and Green’s base in Team Line Tower Wars with my bestfriend.

Green and Pink were always the worst, no matter what ‘leet’ player was playing in those colors they’d always manage a way to fail. They normally didn’t have any team correlation as seen by their ‘So pro’ disjointed built buildings. For a game’s Basic Rule Knowledge to build a maze, – a maze meaning several holes in the wall enough to fit an elephant – Pink and Green always won the nobel prize. When ever we finished completely ‘Owning’ and ‘Raping’ our enemies we’d get Brb privileges to go get some food, go to the bathroom, or to see what our parents wanted (we sometimes had to do this in game, no choice on that one).

Small Tip: When dealing with gamers, best to ask when they’re GGed and not when they’re doing the GG process – We never listen during.

Anyway, when I was ‘idleing’ or waiting on my gamer buddies, I’d always do the surveys Jeremy would send me. I enjoyed rating and picking the option that best represents me and reading the end result created. I knew that what ever they said on those things was fake as it never had enough twisted humor and explosives added in, but I liked them because they’d amuse me to some extent or another.

This job that I have has sucked all the amusement and content out of doing surveys. I absolutely loathe surveys. I hate the rating scale system with my raging black heart.

What I have to say at least 60 times a day:

ME: Hello, my name is -so and so- I’m calling on behalf of -what ever dealership-. May I please speak to -Joey Miller-.

Joe isn’t here right now, I’m his wife though.

ME: Oh I see, well this is in regards to the Toyota that was serviced in on March 28. By any chance were you the one who took the car into the dealership?

No, I’m not but you can ask me the questions, he tells me all about it.

ME: Sorry ma’am, but I have to speak to the person who took the car in for service, it’s for confirmation purposes.

Well, he just came home, let me get him.

*Waits*

Hello?

ME: Hello, this is -so and so- and I’m calling on before of -dealership-. We would like to thank you for servicing in your Toyota with us and ask you a few questions about your service experience on March 28. This will take only 2-3 minutes of your time, is that okay?

Sure.

ME: Just to confirm, were you the one who took the car in for service?

What?

ME: Were you the one who took the car in for service.

Oh, oh, yeah.

ME: Great, just so you are aware, this call may be monitored or recorded for quality control purposes.

Kay…

ME: On a scale of 1-10, where 10 is completely satisfied, how satisfied are you with that service experience?

10

ME: Thank you! That’s good to hear. Based on your recent experience, how likely is it that you would recommend the dealership to your family or friends as a place to service their vehicle?

Very likely.

ME: Oh, could you please rate that on a scale of one to ten where ten is I would definitely recommend the dealership for service?

Oh, sorry, 9.

ME: Fantastic! How likely is it that you would return to the dealership again?

Is that still on the same rating scale?

ME: Yes.

Then a 10.

ME: Wonderful to hear sir! And in your opinion, what is the one KEY thing the dealer did well on this visit?

Uhhhhh..They washed my car.

ME: Thank you. You may receive a survey from your vehicle’s manufacture in the near future. We would appreciate you taking the time to complete and return that survey as it helps the manufacture to be more responsive to your automotive needs. Can we count on you to participate in this survey process?

Sure.

ME: Thank you. At this time, we provide everyone the opportunity to leave a recorded message or comment that will be sent directly to the dealer. I will not be able to listen to what you say. Would you like to leave a message?

Uh, yeah, sure. I just wanted to say that Bob the service guy is completely awesome, he really cares for his customers and that it’s so nice to see that someone still cares.

ME: That’s great to hear sir, but I’m afraid that I won’t be able to hear what you say because I’d have to transfer you over to a recorded message which is how the dealership will know that you complimented Bob on his great work. Let me go ahead and do that. I’m transferring you over to the recorded message. When you hear the tone, you can begin talking. You have about 30 seconds to this message. Thank you for completing this survey and have a nice day!

Oohhhh okay. Thanks.

ME: Thank you, have a good day, buh bye.

Bye.

*Waits for the customer to be transferred or for him to hang up.*

That’s my awesome job. It really isn’t bad, beats carrying bricks in the sun.

I got this old lady on the phone who was the baby sitter of that household saying that she had no idea what this ‘Toyota’ was. So I had to spend 5 minutes repeating myself on the intro because I thought we were just having bad communication problems and that she couldn’t hear me pronouce the dealership’s name. I can understand though, Toyota has only been around since the late 1930’s, not many people know what they do.

Edit: I actually was offered another job and I took it. I’ll explain in another post.

Exquisite Corpse.

Sigh, here we go again.

Satanic guy who says he isn’t really satanic and I were exchanging notes the other day. I have taken great note that if you send little pieces of paper with words written on it back and forth this, somehow, is a sign of affection or something. In the notes that were sent back and forth I think he said that I was pretty, cute, he cares for me, he wants to be friends, I’m a good person, ect. Actually, in the beginning, he goes to say that he wants me to come over to where he’s sitting so that he can give me a ‘Friendly kiss’. Friendly kiss? What? All this was exchanged in a total of four notes and in within like 6 hours.

People are so pathetic.

I haven’t even sat down and spoken to him conversationally and he’s already hitting on me through words written on paper. Bah. We don’t even know each others NAME. So it wasn’t even like we got that far.

I believe he’s 29 years old. Honestly, that’s a bit much for someone to be hitting on me. Normally age doesn’t matter, if they’re a cool person then they’re cool, they don’t need to be within your age group for you to be friends with them. But when there’s someone who’s almost double your age who’s hitting on you, that’s a bit much for me to take it seriously. It isn’t creepy to me because I always get this on the streets and, to me, it’s just another person hitting on me, but it’s just grah, go away, I’m not going to hang out with you anytime soon.

It eventually came to my attention that he was creating too much crap so I had to smash him down a bit. Now, I say this with great sadness buried in the dirt, he’s avoiding me.

Score! :D.

I find it some what a pity that I never even got to talk to him about his ‘some what non-satanic’ religion, but meh, I care more about which dead baby cattle I’ll eat.

Hail Satan

I walked upon my usual route to the bathroom at work when suddenly a bulky muscly-man wearing a size Medium Iron Maiden shirt that looked like it would simply tear off of him if he did any sudden movements gave me the metal horns sign. I re-act and out stretch my index finger and pinkie back at him.

No words were said.

Second time this event emerged. ‘Rock on.’ Was said while wearing the horns proudly in one’s fist. ‘You too, man.’ Was said back with the same gesture.

Third time, I customized myself in doing it as he passed by from where I sat.”Yeaahhh!” was his reply repeating ‘our’ greeting/goodbye sign.

Fourth time he pushed himself on to this sign and said, “Hail Satan.” Quickly getting back to where he was intended to work. I looked slightly baffled and turned to a co-worker that was standing next to me, “I’m satanic now?”. He shrugged down at me and we both turned our heads to watched our friend pick up her stuff so we could walk through San Jose together.

I pondered as we watched. *Do I look satanic? Is it the boots? ..Probably it’s the hair, I guess I have satanic hair. Wait, that’s not right….How am I satanic?*

Filth occurrence took place we so happened to be standing and not walking anywhere.

“Hail satan,” he said baring those Devil Horns that should probably not be called Metal Horns under this situation.

“You know,” I said “I’m atheist.” I countered this time, trying to correct my moral, healthy, scientific, image he already procreated without any details.

“You are? That’s great! You…you know what I believe in? I believe in myself and Only myself.” As he brought his hands closer to his chest.

“Sooooo….Why do you say hail satan if you don’t believe?” I looked at him a bit ajar at what angle he was coming from.

“Because I hate Christians.”

“Why?”

“I just hate them.”

“Yea, but why?”

We were shoo-ed out and told to get back to work. He said something along the lines of this conversation needs to be continued.

So let me just do a little break down on the stupidity even though he seems like a pretty amusing jello fellow.

Break Down

So he is:

1. A satanist who doesn’t believe in a god.
2. An atheist who believes in a god. (Conflict much?)
3. Not very intelligent in selling one’s true opinion.
4. Not very good at advocating anti-christism. (Or whatever the word is)
5. Not very intelligent period as seen by the thoroughly thought out plan.

To me, he doesn’t seem satanic as he said he believes in only himself, but then again, satanists believe in only themselves and think to be gods. Well, I can tell you off the bat that I Am God, or at least think of myself to be *shifty eyes* even when gravity still seems to prove me wrong on this particular factor. I damn Isaac Newton for this. But just because I believe myself to be god doesn’t mean I have to go prancing about saying I’m a satanic and I get magical black voodoo powers from believing in the broken angel.

Now I feel awfully compelled to write a whole section on Satanists and Satanism..

Stay tuned for this post. I’ll link it up here when I’m done with it.