I’m being fatten up to go to the farm house.
My room looks like a dinosaur sat on it, so I’m getting my sister to clean my room for 2k colones as I R Lazia, lolol. Yar, but seriously, my room is starting to look like a freaking mutant experiment exploded on the floor.
I’m getting chubby. My friends were giggling at me that I was getting a beer-belly, I was like “I”LL STAB JOOOO.” it was all in good, bleedy, will though. So now I have to be one of those girls who’s like, “No, Fuck meat, I’ll just eat a salad.” God. That’s so horrible. I think I’d rather be fat than to skip a meal without any sort of chunky beefy cattle or some meat oriented produce thingie. Actually, instead of getting piggier, I’m actually going to exercise and…stuff. Though, gyms are probably the most boring thing one can possibly do in ones’ spare time that I’d much rather just try and do it at home free of charge.
Sunday was my last day of binge. I got a 50 dollar gift certificate to use for Outback so I invited Ricardo and Vero to come with me. Vero ordered a Salad, I complained about how she ordered something so…Just.. Why?! She said she had an Outback burger last Thursday and that she’s only ordered a salad once prior to this event at a restaurant. Ricardo and I are pigs and we just went straight for the ‘No Rules Burger’. I ordered everything expect tomatoes because Ricardo mentioned to take the tomatoes out as ordering everything + Tomatoes = Rape In Face ROFL. Ricardo is the all-knowing-food-eater. I didn’t tell the waiter to put the BBQ sauce on the side like Ricardo did and as a consequence my hands ended up as the burger than feeding me the burger. After that I had a Sinful Sundae which I could not finish as half way through it my liver started screaming, “Oh god, Oh god, Fucking stop feeding me more sugar WOMAN!”. We got the check and Ricardo and Vero somehow thought it was like normal where I pay my half and they pay their half. I owed Ricardo some money from before so he just said, “Let’s call it even.” I was a bit confused by this as I thought I was taking them out for lunch. When I told him it was on me he insisted then I forcefully said, “I still owe you Damn It!” and he singly acted out the scenario if we were to take things further by saying, “Oh god! Please don’t hurt me! I’ll pay you back damn you! And if you still complain I’ll pay you TWICE as much as before. No No! Anything but that! Please! Please. Just pay me back! Take my money you bastard! Okay okay! Just don’t hurt me.”
Anyway, around that time I deiced that I will try and loose this ever-so growing belly that I have summoned.
Somehow we directed ourselves to the supermarket and I ended up buying a bag of potato chips and two bags of 204g skittles. Ricardo went, “Sooo, how’s the diet working out for ya?” I gave him one of those, ‘Oh, just…Hush you.. you.. Just.. Grrr.’ faces. They bought some beer; which never helps matters nor weight loosing. We rented Hot Fuzz and the movie named Bug to combine with our obese-causing-munchies.
Hot Fuzz was amazing. It was weird for me a bit because I had some trouble understanding the British accent, which is completely strange as I’m always able to understand without a problem. They didn’t have a thick accent either so, wtf. I feel stupid for it. Though!!! Hot Fuzz was amazing because anyone who saw Shawn Of The Dead would be able to appreciate it as it had the same actors and even had the same pub that Shawn and his best friend were drinking at. There were some hilarious parts where the movie had to be paused as our laughter was so loud that the actor’s voices were being drowned. During the movie I was eating the red-bag skittles that makes you gain 1kg of pure fatness along with the heart-attack chips and, on top of that, drinking some cold dark-beer. After the movie we took a break to eat some more. Gobbling ourselves silly with some home-made chocolate cake and some vanilla ice cream. I honestly didn’t want any to begin with (I swear), but then Ricardo had to open his slut mouth and say, “Are you sure? This is your last binge day.” I took that has ‘Are you sure? This is your last cake…forever.’ I was like, “Ahhhhhhhhhh, Fuck it.” and ate like it was my last day EVER to be sinful. I was too stuffed to finish the cake and ice cream though, but god damn, I tried my hardest.
After cake we watched Bug which was….I’d call it a….bad movie. It was about this paranoid chick who meets this other paranoid dude, he happened to be home-schooled, and he told her that he was an escaped victim from this twisted government experiment and they were out to get him. He ‘brought’ bugs with him which just helped with their paranoia and then both of them started looking like coke addicts as their skin became dis-mangled and rashy. There was a scene where the whole motel room was covered in tinfoil and bug zappers, the paranoid chick was like, “The foil helps scramble the signal. The bugs…They’re the transmitters.” I sometimes wonder how the actors can act so seriously in something that..just..isn’t.. No. The movie became a suspense horror to comedy within moments. Not really a movie I’ll tell anyone about.
